It's funny, when I began my year of internship for my BA program I was in, many people told me to prepare myself for a big year of growth. I kind of shrugged it off because I already had my major year of growth when I served with Youth Encounter for a year. However, internship year served as a huge year of personal growth. The crazy thing is, I thought that was it again. 2010, you, my friend, might've been my biggest growth year yet. It's truly been a year of gathering oil in my meantime.
So this blog post is 20 things from 2010...my best and favorite gleanings, findings, and things I've put in my pocket this year. It's a collage of the mental, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual oil I've collected in 2010. Enjoy!
- Facing the harsh reality of one of my favorite sins:
"We wear busyness like a badge of honor when we should be repenting of seeking validation there." --Trey Herweck - Deliverer by Vicky Beeching
- "Are you hoping that a change in circumstances will bring a change in your attitude? If so, you are in prison, and you need to learn a secret of traveling light. What you have in your Shepherd is greater than what you don't have in life." --Max Lucado, Traveling Light
- Wonderful self discovery. :-)
Tonight's discovery: All of my close relationships are a dichotomy of extreme silliness and intense depth. I like this and all those who share these qualities with me. –my journal, 11/2 - Your Love Never Fails by Jesusculture.
- Being grounded in the truth of God’s Word. Especially Psalm 16.
- "He is before all things, and in him all things hold together." Colossians 1:17
- "If you're not happy with something, evaluate the situation. Can you change something to make that better? If yes, okay! Be proactive--do something about it. If not, let it go. Some things you can't control and you have to learn to let go and let God." --a wise woman I know.
- "Sometimes grace is speaking harsh truth. Sometimes it's not saying anything."--my twitter, 4/22
- "Because I'm so scared of being alone
That I forget what house I live in
But it's not my job to wait by the phone
For her to call"
--Caedmon's Call, Table for Two (give it a listen..it's great!) - Being connected in a church family with theAlley.
"Everything in this world will fail you...your family, your friends, your church, everything. But Jesus WILL NOT FAIL YOU." --Pastor Ben, theAlley - Don Miller's blog, books, and seeing him live.
"Before I realized we were supposed to fight fear, I thought of fear as a subtle suggestion in our subconscious designed to keep us safe, or more important, keep us from getting humiliated. And I guess it serves that purpose. But fear isn't only a guide to keep us safe; it's also a manipulative emotion that can trick us into living a boring life." --Don Miller, “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years” - Get help. No matter what it is…we all have something we need to ask for help with. Work,relationships,medical issues, counseling, fitness, spiritual help, etc. You are not weak for asking. You are living in freedom from whatever binds and being proactive in breaking down those chains.
- Living in relationship—this picture has just a few of the people that have encouraged, challenged, and walked with me through a year of growing. Relationships and all the stuff that goes with them challenge and fulfill me more than anything. To you all, I'm so indebted.
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." --Moulin Rouge - Running the Pura Vida 5K -- Being part of something bigger than myself to celebrate someone very special that God used in big ways. It was definitely my greatest physical challenge this year.
- Have a mentor and be a mentor. I can't tell you how valuable it is to learn from someone who has been there and is a season or two wiser than you.
- The Hubbs Center -- I gained lots of perspective and compassion through teaching adults English. It was amazing to see their dedication to something as difficult as learning to read so that they could better care for their families. My time there also confirmed my love for different cultures and people. This place is doing incredible things.
- The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning
"Each of us pays a heavy price for our fear of falling flat on our face. It assures the progressive narrowing of our personalities and prevents exploration and experimentation. ... If we are going to keep growing, we must keep on risking failure throughout our lives." "After falling on your face, are you still firmly convinced that the fundamental structure of reality is not works but grace? Are you moody and melancholy because you are still striving for the perfection that comes from your own efforts and not from faith in Jesus Christ? Are you shocked and horrified when you fail? Are you really aware that you don't have to change, grow, or be good to be loved?” - Time spent reflecting and journaling. It is one of the best gifts you can give yourself. It brings self-awareness and helps you to be proactive in areas of difficult. It also is a way to celebrate wins and triumphs.
"It is said that the greatest learning happens through experience. I think that's only part of it. Experience will give you scars and tattoos and put miles on your car. But reflection..reflection on those experiences is where wisdom is gained."—my journal, 8/23 "I'm always glad when I can look back and think of times and places that have brought joy and wisdom to my life and be grateful for them, but all the while not wishing I'm anywhere else but now. Lord, you are good yesterday, today, and forever."—my journal, 9/7 - If you wait until your “fixed” to let someone love you, it will never happen. Let others embrace the mess. Jesus already did on the cross. Live in that grace.
Christ has come to bring joy, peace, hope, and freedom.
May you see it all around you in 2011.